This begging stuff really makes me mad,and many times hate myself.I love independence to much to have to beg over something so little.I have little that keeps me sane,and grounded.So when I see myself begging for freaking $20 makes me go crazy!!!!!Like I will carry boxes,write out 40 letters by hand then sit there and beg for something to stupid.Ugh,for the first time I'm letting you know this is what makes me very depressed.It may seems I'm over reacting,but I built myself to be someone to stand on their own,and the fact that I have to go against that and beg makes me angry. Every time I say please it takes a little bit of myself worth,plus more.

P.S:I'll be hanging out with Janiri tomorrow,but I don't think I'll enjoy it because of my crappy financial issue.
P.S.S:This crappy music both my mother and step-father are playing is making me even more mad,but I'll try to deal with it.
P.S.S.S:These money hungry pigs never want to give people a chance to better them selves.How much money do one man need!? All humans care about is self-preservation,and this way of thinking is starting to wear on me!